today I was productive! \^__^/

Yay! It's Friday! And I am in a ridiculously good mood. Even before the caffeine!

Also, Infamous is pretty neat so far. I love the comic book style they have for the 'cut scenes'.

OH GOD I AM SO HUNGRY AND I JUST ATE A SNACK. WHHHHYYYYY?

:D

I'm alright actually. Don't know what to say beyond that.

I've started working on another story, and I like thinking about it. I look forward to writing it. But right now it's not developed enough in the middle to get started. I guess I'm in a writing cycle, I haven't felt like drawing at all. I feel bad for my comic.

I had a fantastic day. Friends, Star Ocean 4, booze, Conan, more booze, Conan II, booze boost, and Twilight (only tolerable with booze). And throw in some fantastic garlic toast, and you have a perfect day.

ugh. I am so lazy. It amazes me sometimes.

Nothin much today, just had another good day. It is a little difficult to motivate oneself after lunch, but I managed to get by. : )

And this is me pmsing! I'm cold and I need waaaaayyy too much sleep, but other than that I feel pretty good. Hung out with my family yesterday after work. We had a slightly-late St. Patrick's day dinner. It was good to see Kris and the kids, even if I didn't actually get to watch much 'Battlestar Galactica' with my parents, like I'd been planning on.

oh! I've been going for walks on my lunch break, but I've been reading during them because 'Daywatch' is getting really good. It isn't exactly safe, but I seem to get by alright. When I run out of morning juices, I think I'm going to go back to having fruit in the morning. I've been feeling kinda fat lately, but I used my parent's scale yesterday and I haven't actually gained anymore weight, so I'm going to chalk that up to PMS and the lack of walking during the winter. I'm excited to start exercising again! Now I just need the time to get started XD My weeks are pretty booked up with regularly scheduled gatherings.

Ahhh! Tomorrow is the first day of Spring! No more snow pls!
I've been thinking about Azriel a lot. If I can get over the small feeling of overwhelmyness, I might start working on the comic again. I hope. several months ago, I was so sure I was going to finish it, then I don't know what happened. Just got depressed I guess.

Lovies!

Things I keep forgetting:

-That I have a good job with people I like and that leaves me with plenty of money and time for other things
-That it makes me happy to do my job, even when I'm feeling crappy
-That I actually like helping people out and that's why I like being an assistant, even if some of the stuff I end up doing is tedious
-FOR FUCKS SAKE IT IS OK TO MAKE MISTAKES!!!!
-Inconsistency is also ok. I can't be afraid to start doing something because I think I'll have to commit to it for all eternity. But being bored with everything because I refuse to start anything IS NOT AN OPTION (life is too short for that shit)
-Taking care of my body/appearance is actually important, because I'm more cheerful when I look nice.
-I need to be more empathetic. I used to be, to the point that watching the news made me cry, but with medication and years I've just gotten super afraid and selfish. Maybe tone that shit down a bit, there missy?
-Oh yeah. And it is still ok to make mistakes.

I'm not a bad person. I just jump off the rails sometimes.

ok. so. someone just got taken away on a stretcher because they shanked themselves during an argument in the hallway right outside of my apartment. yeah.

I did a test Tuesday night and had a pork chop at my parent's house (also cabbage, sweet potato and cornbread). I had a huge headache but I wasn't dizzy after dinner (I had been before). Wednesday I had pizza for lunch and I wasn't dizzy at all Wednesday night (I had a sweet potato, cabbage and cornbread for dinner), and then I got some vitamin D. I'd been taking it when I came back from Italy cause my mom's doctor suggested it might help with winter depression and you know absorbing calcium, and I'd just stopped taking it because I ran out. I had fried rice for lunch today. And I usually get dizzy around 4 or 5pm, so we shall see what happens.

I would also like to note that I went for a walk during my lunch break on Tuesday and it has been sunny out the last few days.

...I still have no idea what is making me dizzy -__-'

Oh also, the blood test I'm supposed to get includes checking my vitamin D level, so I think my medication depletes that, but for some reason I didn't actually ask her. My doctor told me to go back to taking the vitamin D. Of course, I still haven't gone to get the blood test done...

Other than that, all is well.

This job is good for me. It gives me lots to do, the people are nice and it doesn't leave me a lot of room to think about no work things. This is good. And when I get bored or frustrated with the job, I'll just think about the company is working to help people and I'm helping them with that.


^___^

Now, if I could just get the rest of my life in order...

I could have sworn I took my medication last night, but I didn't sleep at all, felt like I was going to throw up for the last 8 hours, and still feel like it and I can't focus on anything so I either contracted some deadly virus from my dinner last night, or I forgot to take my medication.

Why did I come in to work? I am so dumb.

I felt ok yesterday, no dizziness or anything. I had a nice big salad and some cheese spinach things and water. I was so proud of myself too.

I have a problem. I don't like to draw anymore. I'm sure I will again, but just right now it's not that fun. I even started something and I lost interest in it halfway through the coloring. I'll probably never finish it and it doesn't even look that bad.

The problem is, now I don't know what to do with my comic. I want to continue the story, I know where it's going and I want to share it, but the thought of drawing it is soooo unappealing right now. I don't want to go on an official hiatus, cause right now I feel like I'd never go back to it. I want to write the rest of it actually. But that'd make me sad if no one would read it because it doesn't come with pictures anymore. I don't know what to do.

I know, not a particularly big problem on the grand scale of things, but it's bothering me anyway.

I finished P4, started my first picture in over a month, and made a lot of progress on editing my story tonight. Now what?

I've been playing a ridiculous amount of Persona 4...like to the neglect of nearly everything else. I'm 77 hours into it. I really should be doing other things like working on editing my story or working on the comic, but...I don't really want to right now....and I'm so close to finishing the game. I'm in the last dungeon doing some serious leveling.

2nd day of work. I think I like it but I still don't know what the hell I'm doing and I'm adjusting to the fact that I can no longer wake up at the crack of noon and sit around on my ass all day.

And apparently our snow storm made the Swiss news? 0__0

The people I work with are super sweet. I'm glad I have a job.

...but it's supposed to snow some more tonight.

I finished it!!!!!!!

Now lets edit the fuck out of this thing!!!


Also. I would ask the snow to please stop. It has blocked off all social interaction (minus the internets) for me for the past week. This is lame.

I got the job!!!! I now work for super scientists *swoons*

Also, it is snowing hella hard. I'm supposed to start tomorrow and I am afeared to drive in the snow, but if they don't call in a snow day I am so going to try and make it because I neeeeeeeeeeed too.

I'm actually getting excited about this new job. The people I met with were all really fantastic and the interview process was really rigorous. I was one of 300 candidates, and they chose me. I'm going to try very hard to make them happy about their decision.


I also discovered I'd been given incorrect information by the unemployment agency AND misinterpreted my severance package. It just means I'm getting more money from one source and less from the other. It'll even out, all is ok.

And I am making stellar progress on my novel. It's over 100,000 words at this point and I can see the finish line some 10 days away or so. Maybe, it'll be different now that I have to work though.

Finished NaNo several days ago (yay!) but the story is less than halfway done, so I'm still working on it. I really really want to finish it.

I'm tired.

Thanksgiving was nice. It was good to see my family and have tasty foods, and with a minimal amount of drama (my family is good like that). Alicia had dinner with us, but everyone else came over early to help make things and we just hung out. We watched 'Baby Mama' after everything wound down. I really didn't like it at first, but it got tolerable later on.

Friday I didn't even bother getting dressed. I just wrote and drew and watched '30 Rock' and 'Heroes'. That is absolutely it. Didn't even go outside. I'm getting really sensitive about everything lately. And I don't want to be. But I am and trying to make my brain be quiet is making me tired. I'm supposed to be doing this exercise from the book, but I keep forgetting or I don't want to put any effort into it. It's like the first exercise and I'm already failing at it. :

-Righty O then. Quack quack.

Our precinct ran out of English ballots, that's how many people turned out to vote. They had to hand out Spanish ones and walk people through it. : D

That made me smile. ^__^